Monthly Archives: September 2015

Second Place

Posted on by
Reply

I was talking to a woman the other day who told me that she had recently interviewed for a position that she really wanted, but came in second. Her statement got me thinking that sometimes second place is the best outcome. We’re conditioned that winning is the only outcome for which we should strive. After all, who runs a race with a goal of coming in second? But what if second place really turns out to be first place? Let me explain.

I have always believed that there’s always a reason that things work out the way they are supposed to. It’s not fate – it’s simply the way the world works. Here’s my story. When I was about to become a newly-minted college graduate I interviewed for a job managing a shopping center in a medium-sized Midwestern city. I pulled out the stops to prepare for the interview and dazzle the owner’s representative with my charm and good looks because I had no experience! But alas, the owner opted to hire someone else that actually did have experience. Naturally I was disappointed. But had I won that job, who knows where my career path might have led? Instead, I have been blessed with the most incredible opportunities to live my passion over the past 40+ years. In the end, I definitely ended up in first place!

Some may see this as a Pollyanna sort of mindset. After all, who really thinks that they’ve won when they’ve lost? But there’s a method to this madness. The key is to truly believe the notion that something better is always in store for us. When we succeed, it’s a reflection of this reality. When we are unsuccessful it’s a signal that what we wanted wasn’t meant to be . . . because we’re destined for something better. If we doubt that the latter is true, then it’s highly unlikely that we’ll experience that “something better.” We all know the power of the mind. And yes, it’s powerful enough to block and deny positive outcomes when we aren’t open to all possibilities.

It’s hard not to be disappointed when we take second place. But with practice we can learn how to quickly replace the feeling of disappointment with feelings of excitement and anticipation. I’ve reached an interesting point in my life. When I expend extreme effort, work smart and am innovative but still come up short, my heart pounds a little faster and I think to myself, “OK, something pretty amazing must be in store and I can’t wait to find out what it is.” I may even work with some positive affirmations at this point to ensure that I am open and receptive to however the script is about to be re-written.

Here’s a current example of how this actually worked for us. My wife and I have been spending time each winter in Florida (where it’s much warmer than in Kansas City). We decided to stop renting and purchase a condo. We found what we thought was the perfect unit and made an offer which was countered by the seller. We submitted a counteroffer to the seller’s counter and then heard nothing. I was fairly certain that another buyer had emerged which turned out to be the case. But rather than being disappointed, we chose to truly believe that something better was about to happen. And boy did it! A magnificent unit we had previously seen in another building came back on the market. Right after we had initially looked at this unit it went under contract. Apparently the buyer backed out at the last minute and we quickly bought the unit. It has exceeded our wildest expectations. Had we wallowed in despair over the first unit we didn’t get, I’m absolutely convinced that we wouldn’t have connected with the unit we ended up purchasing.

By being open and receptive that something bigger and better is waiting to be revealed, our losses can become spectacular wins. Clearly there is no downside to embracing this mindset.

This blog is being written in tandem with my book, “An Entrepreneur’s Words to Live By,” available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle (My Book), as well as being available in all of the other major eBook formats.

secondplace

Hammer, Hammer, Hammer

Posted on by
Reply

Is trying to hammer a square peg into a round hole a cliché or what? Just for grins, I tried to do this once and had no problem. Of course the hole was a heck of a lot bigger than the peg. But of course that’s not the point. The more we try to force things that aren’t meant to be, the more likely we are to become frustrated and fail. This I do know from lots of experience.

Here’s an example. In the old days I might have interviewed a great candidate for a position we had open. This individual had all the right qualities, the right experience and seemed enthusiastic about joining our firm. We would extend a job offer and perhaps there would have been some back-and-forth dialogue over the terms, salary, etc. But then the candidate went dark and stopped responding. My tendency was for my sales instincts to kick into overdrive and really put the hard press on this person. More often than not the person might eventually come to work for us. But it usually wasn’t a happy marriage and ultimately ended in divorce. What did I learn? If we have to “chase” someone and “sell” them on joining our company, then they probably aren’t the right fit in the first place.

Here’s another example. I have a big decision to make. I’m trying my darnedest to find complete clarity in this situation. I list all of the pros and cons, but the answer still isn’t there for me. I talk to other people whom I trust, but no one grabs me by the hand and opens the door for me. I continue to press for a revelation, but none comes to me. The frustration mounts and I feel stress because the decision must be made immediately. The stupid peg just won’t go into the hole! What did I learn? Complete clarity is often elusive and most of the time we have to make the best decision we can after considering all of the facts. And we need to trust our gut to some extent.

Here’s the final example. A number of years ago there was an investor who owned a large apartment complex that our firm wanted to manage. I cultivated a relationship with this investor and met with him regularly. I tried everything I could think of to convince him to retain our services. He was self-managing the property and I just knew we could improve his bottom line. All of my creative marketing and sales methods were for naught. We never were able to win the business. I hammered and hammered and hammered, and the square peg never made it into the round hole. What did I learn? We’re not going to win 100% of the time. As long as we’re paying attention to the basics and fundamentals mixed with a sufficient dose of creativity, we’ve done what should be done. Sometimes we’ll succeed and sometimes we won’t. Trying to force success is a pathway to being demoralized.

When we force things and try to muscle through, we often flounder and fail. When we relax, pay attention to the details and trust our instincts, we improve the probability that things will fall into place. And if they don’t, we simply stop hammering and move on.

This blog is being written in tandem with my book, “An Entrepreneur’s Words to Live By,” available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle (My Book), as well as being available in all of the other major eBook formats.

hammer

Connecting the Dots

Posted on by
Reply

Why should I care about politics? It’s just a bunch of doublespeak from a collection of greedy, grimy people with big egos. Why should I care about the Consumer Sentiment Index? Isn’t it just some arcane statistic that gets published every so often? Why should I care about the financial crisis in Greece? Why should I care about the number of Baby Boomers who will reach 65 each year for the next ten years?

Entrepreneurs are a busy lot. We’re always on the run and totally consumed by what goes on in our world. So it’s tough to stay abreast of what is happening “on the outside.” And besides, there’s so much information out there that it’s simply overwhelming. Right? All of this is pretty much true . . . and more. But here’s the big “however.” Everything that is happening around us – 24/7 – is a treasure trove of opportunity. If we invest some time and effort, the information we uncover may help us connect the dots. These are the dots that could lead us to discover a new and innovative product; or identify a trend that could help or hurt our business.

Connecting the dots will require an open mind, a healthy dose of curiosity and the ability to think critically. I’ve always wanted to be the one to connect the dots as opposed to having someone else do so because that “someone else” could very well be a competitor. Some things we learn may have no direct connection to anything to do with our business or personal lives. And yet, we never know exactly when a supposedly random tidbit might be that final puzzle piece we’ve been desperately seeking and didn’t even know what it looked like. I’m constantly advocating that we entrepreneurs should be voracious readers of everything we can get our hands on. And what we read should be broad and diverse.

Allow me to try and tie all of this together with a hypothetical example. Let’s assume that you and I own a company that manufactures fine oak barrels for premium wines. Why do we care about politics? A stiff tariff was being proposed on the special metal bands that we import from Japan to secure our barrels. Our relationship with several elected officials enabled us to educate them on the unintended consequences of this action and the tariff idea was scrapped. Dot A was connected to Dot B. As students of the Consumer Sentiment Index (compiled and published monthly by the University of Michigan) we learned that Americans are becoming increasingly more optimistic about the future of the country. Based upon history, we know that Americans drink more expensive wines when the future outlook is bright. With this knowledge, we make the decision to expand production of our wine barrels to meet increased demand. Dot C was connected to Dot D and then Dot E.

The ongoing financial crisis in Greece proved to be a tipping point for us with respect to a significant customer there who bought large lots of our wine barrels periodically. Because the Greek government restricted the amount of cash that could be withdrawn from the banks on a daily basis, we became concerned that this customer might have difficulty selling his product. We suggested that he scale back his order until more normal conditions existed in his country which saved us from carrying a large account receivable with him. Dot F was connected to Dot G.

Finally, by studying the demographic trends involving the number of retiring Baby Boomers and matching that with their buying habits, we projected that there could be a large increase in their purchase of premium California wines. We deployed one of our top salespeople, armed her with this data and sent her to call on the wineries in the Napa Valley. She came back with a terrific picture of how these wineries intend to introduce several new brands that match with the emerging tastes of the Baby Boomers. Dot H was connected with Dot I.

Paying attention to the world around us can yield valuable information. We can then connect the dots using this data in ways that contribute to the success of our enterprise.

This blog is being written in tandem with my book, “An Entrepreneur’s Words to Live By,” available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle (My Book), as well as being available in all of the other major eBook formats.

connecting the dots

False Choices

Posted on by
Reply

It’s 3:00 AM. You’ve just awakened with a start. Your heart is racing – not pounding, just a generally anxious sort of feeling. You aren’t sure why this is happening. There’s no sound of an intruder and everything externally seems to be in order. Then you lay there struggling to return to your slumber. You know you have to get up in two or three hours, and you know you desperately need to finish getting your rest. But there’s one BIG problem. Your mind won’t let you.

I’ve never figured out exactly what causes this. There’s obviously something churning around in our subconscious. And it’s frustrating beyond belief to wake up this way, not know why, and then try to drift back to the Land of Nod. And I can attest to what happens next. I will allow my mind to conjure up False Choices. Perhaps I’ve been in the middle of a complicated real estate deal that has a lot of “hair” on it – that is, many moving parts that aren’t all moving as planned. At this point the game begins. Here’s the dialogue that occurs.

What if the appraisal for the apartment complex comes back at slightly less than is needed? Then the loan amount will be less and the equity requirement will be more. But wait a minute – I only have an equity commitment for the exact requirement and I don’t have time to raise the extra amount that will be needed! Oh my (or some other less printable phrase) – we won’t be able to close this deal!! If this happens we’ll lose the earnest money that is now totally at-risk; we’ll lose all of our credibility within the industry; we’ll never be able to do another deal again; I’ll go broke and have to live under a bridge!!!!!!

OK, the bridge part may be a little dramatic, but you get the idea. The point is that in this state of semi-consciousness it’s very easy for our mind to magnify our concerns and create wild scenarios that are disconcerting. Often, logic is totally absent in these moments, and because of this the False Choices become overwhelming. Fortunately I’ve gotten to the point where I rarely experience this anymore. But I can tell you that in years past I’ve gotten so worked up that I had to get out of bed and become totally awake to bring my full faculties to bear and find the solution. Kind of blows the opportunity to get any more sleep completely out of the water . . . right?

Rather than trying to figure out what triggers this kind of response, I’ve learned how to avoid letting my mind run away in this manner. If I do wake up with that general feeling of unease or even if something specific looms in my mind’s-eye, I immediately deny it. That’s it. I refuse to allow the monsters in my brain to come to the surface and get any satisfaction whatsoever. It’s my belief that we are extremely vulnerable when we are half-awake and half-asleep, and trying to resolve any sort of issue is futile and dangerous. If we let down our guard, invariably we end up in False Choices.

Learning how to deny these thoughts will not be easy at first. It will take a lot of practice. What I do is quickly translate the issue that is bubbling up into a visual image – perhaps it’s a dragon from a fantasy world. Then I take out my might dragon slaying sword and thrust it deeply into the dragon’s chest at which point it melts away and I fall asleep again. Thus, I’ve taken the horrible problem that somehow has invaded my sleep; turned it into a dragon; killed it instantly, and gone back to sawing logs. While this might sound corny, I can tell you that with practice it works. It doesn’t matter what the outer issue is, I simply turn it into a dragon and eliminate it.

We must avoid the False Choices that may be presented while we sleep. Denying them before they have a chance to take hold of our minds will allow us to deal with them in a rational fashion when we are awake.

This blog is being written in tandem with my book, “An Entrepreneur’s Words to Live By,” available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle (My Book), as well as being available in all of the other major eBook formats.

dragon_slaying