When I was a young lad in my formative years there was a hard and fast rule set for my sister and me. As soon as the Christmas or birthday wrapping paper was discarded, we went to our respective rooms and began writing thank-you notes. It didn’t matter how insignificant the gift (or whether it was something we wanted) a thank-you note was written. And writing something like, “Dear Grandmother – thank you for the sweater you sent for Christmas,” was wholly insufficient. Mom expected something more in the order of, “Dear Grandmother – thank you for the lovely sweater you sent me for Christmas. I can’t wait to wear it at my upcoming band concert. I’ll send you a picture of me wearing the sweater after the concert. We miss you and wish we could see you more often.” And by golly, I wore that sweater at the band concert and sent a follow-up note with the photo.  

Our daughters were subjected to the same practice when they were young though I’m not sure that our grandchildren have adopted the ritual . . . which is unfortunate. It sometimes seems that expressing gratitude is becoming a lost art. I’ve written before about how living in gratitude makes our lives so much richer and rewarding. It opens the flow of positive energy that allows us to thrive in any situation. I’ve advocated for keeping a gratitude journal in which we write daily, making note of the various people and things for which we are grateful each day. I know that when I hit a rough spot in my life, focusing on that for which I am grateful always centers me and puts me back on track.

Here’s the thing. Entrepreneurs have endless reasons to be grateful. Who among us hasn’t been encouraged by someone along the way? Who among us hasn’t received a helping hand from a kind soul who selflessly made our way smoother? Who hasn’t been the beneficiary of opportunities that were created by someone else? Do we truly feel grateful for these actions, or do we take them for granted? Perhaps we have even rationalized a sense of entitlement . . . which would be unfortunate. “I know my company has assigned me some terrific projects that have been very helpful to my career, but I work long hours to make these projects successful.” What is not said (but maybe thought) is, “I don’t need to express gratitude to anyone because I go above and beyond to do my job.”

What is the proper way to express gratitude to others? First and foremost, it needs to be heartfelt. Simply going through the motions (like I did with my sweater letter) is not true gratitude. We need to think specifically about what others have done for us. This is where a gratitude journal can be helpful. It establishes a practice whereby we focus on our bounty – material or otherwise – and identify the source that facilitated it. This doesn’t take anything away from our own accomplishments. It simply completes the circle of gratitude. We acknowledge that source as well as being proud of what we ultimately accomplished.

When our gratitude is coherent with our head and our heart, we can offer an outward expression of it. Perhaps it takes the form of looking someone in the eye and telling them how much their support has meant and how appreciative we are. Maybe it’s a handwritten note of thanks. Possibly it takes the form of a gift of some sort. Regardless of the method, intentionality is the key and will be felt by the recipient.  

Learning how to be grateful and expressing gratitude to others is a practice that is critical to living an amazing entrepreneurial life. And I want to say thank you to my mom in heaven for instilling in me the foundational elements of gratitude.

This blog is being written in tandem with my book, “An Entrepreneur’s Words to Live By,” available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle (My Book), as well as being available in all of the other major eBook formats.